Feeling Blessed and at Peace

Feeling Blessed and at Peace

Last week I took a big step in my infertility journey, I decided to email my RE doctor and ask if he would be willing to try IUI with injectables on me. Now I already knew how my doctor feels about this procedure, he strongly believes its a waste of both his and my time. So over the course of a week we have been emailing back and forth, him encouraging me to reconsider donor eggs, me stating I want the IUI with injectables, then him stating  he would try IUI with clomid and me again saying no I want IUI with injectables. So after going around and around, I guess he realized he was dealing with one crazy determined lady and so he relented and agreed to preform the procedure. Now the funny thing is as soon as he gave me the OK I began doubting myself, I mean who am I really. I'm no doctor, I don't have the years of study and clinical hours he has, hell I don't even understand half of the terms associated with someone in my condition. But what I do know is that I have to be my own advocate, I cant just sit on the sidelines and allow doctors to make decisions about my life and blindly follow men in white lab coats. So I began to research and surprisingly have found women have gone on to conceive with and without the help of an RE.  Ultimately I want the opportunity to be given a chance at IVF with my own eggs, however I am willing to take this small step until I can get my doctor on board.

I asked my mother & my best-friend this week how do I know if God is speaking to me, with everything that has been going on I wanted to make sure I was following a path God wanted me to take. Well in a nutshell they said that God will present the path he wants you to take or in other words a path becomes more accessible to you. So then I immediately thought about me emailing my doctor and how we went back and forth but ultimately he showed me the path I wanted  to walk along. I also thought about my acupuncture appointment and how I would need to move it forward (June 10th) if I was indeed going to try and start IUI with my next cycle and low and behold when I checked online appointment scheduler they had an appointment for this coming Tuesday. Lately things have been lining up the way I need them to in preparation for my upcoming infertility treatment and I am forever feeling blessed. I have the support of family and friends and I am just feeling so loved right now. Last week I was feeling gloom at the prospective of not being a mother yet, but this week it seemed everywhere I turned I was given a positive message or encouraging word. I feel like God puts positive people in your life to show you the rainbow is coming during your storms and all week I had friends pointing out how blessed I am...

1. I have an amazing husband who supports me in his own way
2. I was able to convince my RE to administer a procedure he didn't really want to do for me. 
3. I have insurance to cover the cost of medicines, IUI procedure, and the monitoring I am going to need.
4. I can begin to take acupuncture as a way to help support my body and can afford to this.

So even though this infertility journey has been a long and stressful roller coaster with highs and lows  I am so in love with the idea that it could be worse and I believe that my story will have a happy ending.I am looking forward to what is in store for me as I realize now that God is walking alongside me on this journey.I will update later on this week as to where I am in my cycle and my IUI protocol.